One of those days....

Today.....I'm having one of those days. Feeling really discouraged. And the worst part is that I don't even feel like fighting against it. I just want to yield to its relentless onslaught, give up, and sulk in my bed all day.


I feel swamped my emotions and unnecessary agitation. So much has happened in the past couple of weeks. So many things that should have strengthened my faith...... But, have you noticed that when life seems to be going great, and you feel spiritually rich, those are the times when satan likes to hit the hardest? Casting lies in the subtle ways. Today, I listened to him.....
I allowed him to fill my mind with past mistakes. I found myself examining my life to find all those places where I failed, or messed up, or said/did something wrong. I allowed my fears to take over.


But just wait....wait one minute...what am I doing? I've lost focus. Why have I given up so easily? My excuse is that I'm tired......but really? There is no excuse! I have to get off my high horse, my selfish parade, and refocus my mind and heart on God. Truth is, I hadn't even opened my bible, nor uttered even one prayer. I know.....that is so messed up.

So, I jump into the word, and start searching for encouragement; Saying a quick prayer asking God to change my heart, and renew my mind, and help me focus on Him.
Then turning on my ipod, in hope of music lifting my spirits, I was reminded of the the song "Strong Tower" by Kutless....


When I wander through the desert
And I'm longing for my home
All my dreams have gone astray
When I'm stranded in the valley
And I'm tired and all alone
It seems like I've lost my way

I go running to your mountain
Where your mercy sets me free

You are my strong tower
Shelter over me
Beautiful and mighty
Everlasting King
You are my strong tower
Fortress when I'm weak
Your name is true and holy
And Your face is all I seek

In the middle of my darkness
In the midst of all my fear
You're my refuge and my hope
When the storm of life is raging
And the thunder's all I hear
You speak softly to my soul


and " By Your Side" - Tenth Avenue North


Why are you striving these days
Why are you trying to earn grace
Why are you crying
Let me lift up your face
Just don't turn away

Why are you looking for love
Why are you still searching
As if I'm not enough
To where will you go child
Tell me where will you run
To where will you run

'Cause I'll be by your side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Look at these hands at my side
They swallowed the grave on that night
When I drank the world's sin
So I could carry you in
And give you life
I want to give you life

And I'll be by your side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Here at my side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

'Cause I, I love you
I want you to know
That I, yeah I'll love you
I'll never let you go, no, no

And I'll be by your side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you

Here at my side wherever you fall
In the dead of night whenever you call
And please don't fight these hands that are holding you
My hands are holding you
Here at my side, my hands are holding you
Ohhh...


How could I loose sight of this? Of HIM? How could I fall captive to discouragement knowing how much God loves me? He is my strength! I should run to him when I am weak.
When I am tempted to be discouraged, rather than sulk and feel sorry for myself, I should immerse myself in the word. Rather than think about my failers, I need to remember God’s goodness in the past.

And you know what?! When I thinking about all the good things that God has already done in my life, my spirit is lifted.





HE must become great, I must become less.....
So, anyways, these are just my thoughts and struggles today.....


blessings <3